How Self-Compassion Shapes Our Health

Self-compassion, a practice rooted in kindness and understanding towards oneself, plays a pivotal role in shaping brain development and overall well-being. Many people find self-compassion challenging due to societal expectations in the workforce, upbringing, cultural norms, and other influencing factors. The way in which we show ourselves compassion, however, not only affects our mind, but our brain and body health as well.

Imagine you’re boarding a flight and you’ve just found your seat. The flight attendants are explaining the oxygen mask safety protocol, and they say this: “Be sure to secure your own mask before assisting others.” At first thought, many of us think of this as a selfish act. The fact is, yet, we cannot help others effectively if we do not allow ourselves the same act of understanding.

This applies to our health as well! When we punish ourselves for even minor mistakes, we lose touch with our bodies' signals and needs. For example, missing work while sick often stems from guilt about missing work, even when we're seriously ill. I know there have been times where I have been in the hospital and was plagued with thoughts of, “Ugh I’m missing so much work..” Without self-compassion for our health, we overexert our bodies and minds, which slows down healing and can cause further damage.

Studies show that self-compassion leads to decreased anxiety, loneliness, anger, and depression. It calms down our nervous systems, which helps us regulate other bodily functions, and keep us in a relaxed and healthy state. One study even shows that showing ourselves compassion reduces inflammation in the body. Chronic inflammation, when left untreated, can lead to diseases such as:

- Cancer
- Heart Disease
- Diabetes
- Asthma
- Alzheimer’s 

Examples of self-compassion can be as simple as saying “no” to plans when you have already used up your social battery, or taking a sick day when you’ve reached your limit mentally. It can also look like speaking to yourself kindly vs punishing yourself for not reaching ‘perfection’.

Imagine a scenario where someone is pushing themselves relentlessly at work, constantly striving for perfection and working long hours. They ignore their own physical and emotional needs, sacrificing sleep, healthy meals, and relaxation time to meet deadlines and exceed expectations. They criticize themselves harshly for any mistakes or perceived shortcomings, never allowing themselves to rest or recover.

In this scenario, ignoring self-compassion would likely lead to negative implications rather than growth and health. Here's how:

1. Burnout: By neglecting self-compassion, this person is at a high risk of burnout. Constantly pushing oneself without allowing for rest or relaxation can lead to physical and emotional exhaustion, decreased motivation, and lowered productivity in the long run.
2. Impacted Well-being: Ignoring self-compassion can lead to increased stress, anxiety, and even depression. Constant self-criticism and perfectionism can wear down self-esteem and overall well-being, making it difficult to maintain a positive outlook on life.
3. Physical Health Issues: Lack of self-compassion can also have physical health implications. Poor sleep, unhealthy eating habits, and chronic stress can weaken the immune system, increase the risk of illness, and contribute to the development of chronic conditions such as heart disease and diabetes.
4. Strained Relationships: Constantly pushing oneself and neglecting self-care can also strain relationships with friends, family, and coworkers. The person may become irritable, withdrawn, or emotionally unavailable, making it difficult for others to connect with them or provide support.

In this scenario, practicing self-compassion is essential for promoting growth and maintaining health. By practicing self-compassion, this person could learn to set more realistic expectations, prioritize self-care, and cultivate a healthier work-life balance. This, in turn, would lead to greater resilience, improved well-being, and more sustainable growth in the long term.

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Written by Kelsi Gallagher